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SPIRALING 🌀

Leslie Alterman — March 6, 2025

Lately, I have been spiraling….our culture might see spiraling as spinning into oblivion. In my experience, spiraling has been grounded in center. Expanding outward and contractions inward. A dance of sorts. A surrender to universal law. Everything in nature begins with a spiral. Our belly buttons hold our essence. The center of our body…it’s a spiral that once upon a time connected us to our mothers…the womb. In nature we find them in galaxies, weather patterns, snails shells, tops of pinecones…

We come from spirals. We are birthed from expansion and contractions.

Spirals are a form of Faith a way of communion with source.A meditative practice. If you can find your center you know how far you can extend past your edges. You have Faith that disruption has its place and we need it for our growth. You also know when to contract and to come back home to yourself.

In December I committed to “wintering”. In my creative process this is a time of going inward. Silencing the outside world and nourishing my roots. Conserving my energy and taking time to slow, rest, retreat. It is always the time where I’m learning, reading and gathering inspiration for my next series of work.

This is in complete opposition of the world we live in as American consumers. There is little reverence for natural processes that are slow and intentional. So much of our world is speeding us up and doing its best to take us out of our essence and true nature. This way of following natures cues is now and has forever been the way I work. I either try to force production or I can surrender and honor my process. It’s not easy. I often consider giving up. Negative voices get loud in winter. The shadow parts are ever present.

But…I continue to listen to that still small voice. The one I rely upon for my creativity.

In January, I went off of social media for a while. When I did that I cleaned up my phone of apps I wasn’t using and I came across one app called, “Centering Prayer”. I didn’t remember ever getting this app. So, I opened it. It lays out a way to pray with four simple guidelines:

1: choose a sacred word

2: sit quietly

3:return to the sacred word when thoughts drift

4: end in silence

So, I began. It seemed simple enough. I had been looking for a prayer practice that felt accessible to me. A way of listening to God.

The suggestion is to sit for 20 minutes twice daily. So, I did. When I began I was saying my sacred word every second it felt like. I was struck by how loud my mind was and how anxiously I was saying my sacred word. Grasping for a clearing of my mind. Eager to connect with God. Excited to seek and really open to this Power greater than myself. It was surrender in the most expansive way I’ve ever been willing to be. I practiced daily. I’m a good student…until….

One evening I was in a bath. I decided to do my practice in a bath…because I heard Kat Williams on Theo Von’s podcast saying he prays under water…Kat is dialed in and so, I decided to try it myself. As I’m about 5 min into my prayer practice, I hear my Grandmothers voice, “take care of your mother”. I opened my eyes and got very scared. I don’t want to do this practice anymore.

My mother and I had been estranged for 5 years. It’s a long story of how we got to that place and me taking care of my mother was beyond my capacity at the time my Grandmother spoke those words to me…I couldn’t.

Fast forward 2 weeks from that underwater prayer…I get a phone call, my mother was admitted to the hospital. Fast forward two weeks more, her husband died, she was admitted to intensive care…her life was on the line. I went to see my mother for the first time in 5 years….

SPIRALS!!!

Prayer sustained me. I showed up. I joined my sister and brother and obeyed the whispers of my Grandmother…we are taking care of my mom.

What I wasn’t prepared for was:

MIRACLES.

When you put aside your ego and you show up in service of something greater…miracles.

My mother is a different person. I am too. We are in the process of reintroducing ourselves to each other.

How perfectly imperfect we all are.

How much I needed this to happen.

How this will inform my work moving forward!!

How much I’m learning from my mother right now. Witnessing her vulnerability, her courage, resilience, humility…it moves me.

How much integrity my brother and sister have. How proud I am of us. How we’ve showed up.

All the love.

About “the work”.

Before all this happened. I was intuitively drawn to working with fibers. I buried some of my fabrics in the dirt, I began stitching tiny pieces of fabric as a meditation, I was eco dying fabrics…

A little history of where I come from, my ancestors. The women on my mother’s side were all incredible artists. Mainly, they sewed. All my childhood my mother sewed. She made so many things. Endlessly talented. Fiber arts, cooking, building, landscaping…she could do anything. Her works was precise and perfect. It pained me to watch her tear things apart that weren’t perfect. I knew I couldn’t be that way…that’s why my work looks imperfect and I celebrate imperfection.

I find it so interesting that my instincts led me to picking up needles, threads and fabrics. That I was being drawn to spirals on my nature walks and contemplating them. That I was being drawn to them and contemplating my beginnings, where I come from…

I began making spirals and cords from fabrics, threads and earth elements.

We had to move my mother to assisted living ( it has been a WILD 2 months) we are in the process of clearing out her house and getting it ready to sell. I found a stash of fabrics in my moms basement and gathered them to use in my work…

I still have no idea where I’m going with all this, but I trust the unfolding. Stitching and mending as I go. The metaphors a plenty!! The universe, God and Ancestors are always available. The question is, how available do we make ourselves to them?

It only requires an open and courageous heart. That’s the beginning. Then you have to commit to the ride.

This whole post is WILD. I’m WILD. Thanks for riding with me…here…on the page…haven’t been to my studio in months. Waiting for spring!! Expectant for spring!!

As always, I invite you to comment. I love reading them and hearing about you and your spirals!